Expecting the Best

Standards of Behavior in Pagan Leadership

Quality-control is a perennial topic of conversation on the Pagan Leaders list. We discuss possible ways of handling sticky situations, examples of mishandling such situations, things people do right and things people do wrong. We talk about how to attract ethical people to leadership positions, and how to support them once in place. And yes, we also talk about damage control in regards to unethical people. Someone eventually put the issue like this: Do we have objective standards to evaluate people in leadership roles within the Pagan community?

Given the vast diversity of traditions in the Pagan community, I think the best we can do is offer some standards which are agreed to and followed more often than not. For instance, the Wiccan Rede "An it harm none, do as thou wilt" is well-known and widely followed, but even it is not universal. We can certainly come up with standards for a particular organization and its members. There may even be a few standards held by all the leaders we might ask -- I think just about everybody (except psychopaths) agrees that it is wrong to harm an innocent person who has done you no harm, for example. The Pagan community as a whole can develop general concepts of what it expects in a leader, and can speak out if somebody in a leadership position grossly falls short of those standards.

One point that must be addressed is the effect of strong personalities in conjunction (or opposition, as the case may be). "Witch wars" often take place when two or more assertive people espouse radically different ideas on a given issue. A fair number of the best-known Pagan leaders, the ones whose names appear in the "mainstream" media, live surrounded by an ever-present buzz of controversy. Does this mean they are not good leaders? Not necessarily.

When considering strong personalities in general, I think we have to admit that most leaders are assertive, forceful, persistent, colorful individuals. Without exception, all the exceptional people I know have, ah, quirks. (For example, my brother Robert and I share a pronounced aversion to cities; we can visit those places but we aren't really comfortable there and certainly wouldn't want to live there.) Third, nobody is perfect. Add all that together and it stands to reason that good Pagan leaders are going to be the ones who manage to accomplish wonderful things, and who do not commit gross violations of civility (things like child abuse and grand larceny leap readily to mind). They are not going to be saints. Many of us wouldn't like them if they were. Heck, we may not all get along anyway, but on the whole I think we do rather well with what we've got. I can make allowances for other people's quirks if they are reasonably tolerant of mine, and that's gotten me pretty far. It's a far sight better than much of the "mainstream" world manages, actually.

In forming an opinion of other leaders, I look at their accomplishments and their general carriage. Do they accomplish good and needful things? Do they follow through on their promises? Do they treat others decently? If I were writing a comprehensive history of the Pagan movement, or a narrower history of some specific branch thereof, I would mention some of the more questionable leaders in considerable detail due to their status important historical figures. Controversial I don't mind; that can be a good thing. What I look at is the balance and whether, on the whole, a person has solved or caused more problems.

The Pagan community does not always do a great job of dealing with the fact that not all the people in leadership positions are worthy of the honor; some of them have past or present problems of note. There is a persistent tendency to deny that our subculture includes its share of indecent, incompetent, or otherwise undesirable individuals (which of course it does). This tendency sometimes extends itself to covering up for the failings of said individuals, in an effort to hide their existence -- all of which does a disservice to Pagans everywhere. However, even our best leaders draw an awful lot of unfriendly fire simply for being imperfect in a world where you just can't please all of the people all of the time. Put together, it's wonder anyone can look at that and then pick up the staff of a High Priest(ess).

Personally, I have never shied away from such issues. I mean, we're all people here, none of us are perfect, we do the best we can with what we've got. I'll speak out if I see somebody doing something I consider to be desperately wrong but I try not to trash folks just for being different or fallible. I also put a lot of weight on how much effort a person puts towards trying to improve. Do they keep trying even after they fall flat a few times, or do they just give up? I reserve more respect for those who try. And it's okay to switch focus -- I was thoroughly disgusted by the ruckus that ensued when Isaac Bonewits decided to resign from his position as Arch-Druid. It's his life; he's the one who knows where it's supposed to go. Gratuitous kibitzing only makes the whiners look foolish.

Raising the question of community-wide standards can make for an interesting discussion -- or a powderkeg, in the wrong circumstances. It depends on the people, and the criteria, involved. We must consider what kind of standards would serve us as a community, and what kind might undermine the very diversity that gives us strength. We must also think about how these standards would appear to the "mainstream" world -- which does not necessarily mean that we must base all of our standards on theirs, merely that we should take into consideration the likely impression and possible means of explaining our ideals clearly enough to avoid misunderstandings.

A set of accepted Pagan standards would be nice, but I'm not sure how practical that is. Once we found something that everyone (or at least as many people as possible) can agree on, would there be enough there to make it worthwhile? For instance, I mentioned the Wiccan Rede as a common but not universal rule. I wouldn't sign a charter featuring that, because it isn't part of my tradition -- if somebody makes the mistake of harming me or mine, I reserve the right to get pissed about it, and I reserve the right to mangle the perpetrator if he, she, or it persists in such offense. But I won't bother someone who has done me no wrong; that I'd sign for. Experience suggests that a lot of other folks might have similar variations, and that if you added them all together there might not be a whole lot of common ground left. It sure would make an enlightening discussion, though.

This invariably brings up the "Ten Commandments" angle, especially given the current wrangle over whether or not this particular document has any business appearing in state buildings. I strongly prefer guidelines listed in "shalt" rather than "shalt not" form. Why? The former covers more ground than the latter, and people are too quick these days to assume that anything legal is therefore moral. Whether or not it is practicable to collate a community-wide set of ethical standards, I believe it well worth the effort for individuals and groups to develop their own. That said...

Here are some standards of behavior which I consider indicative of good Pagan leaders:

They possess and use a selection of group-processing skills to maintain order in their organization, and whenever possible apply these skills to reduce social friction while increasing efficiency and enjoyment. This includes making sure that everyone gets a chance to speak out and disputes are settled in a reasonable manner.
They say what they think, neither speaking with unnecessary cruelty nor hiding what needs disclosure; and they speak honestly without distorting the truth. Likewise they listen when others speak, and take that speech to heart if merited. They can accept suggestions for improvement without snarling at the messenger for criticizing them.
They demonstrate respect for other people, paths, belief systems, and Divinities -- unless those have proven themselves unworthy of respect.
They offer help in any situation where their skills, knowledge, etc. might logically apply; yet they take "no thank you" for an answer. Gracefully. Help offered and accepted is given in the form the recipient wishes to receive, not necessarily what the giver originally had in mind; and if a mutually-acceptable agreement cannot be reached, the matter is discreetly dropped. They also show kindness and compassion for others.
They teach others their knowledge when asked in a polite and honest manner, yet they balance this duty to serve with an understanding of their own limits and stop before stretching themselves too far. They encourage their students to exceed the teacher's own accomplishments, and thereby foster an ever-growing circle of new leaders following the same high ideals.
They show responsibility in all areas, doing what they say they will do. They honor trusts given and take care not to betray any.
They trust their own instincts and remain true to their inner guidance. Although some objective standards do apply, each person must do what is right for himself or herself -- because in the end, that's who has to live with the results of the action or inaction.
They cultivate an awareness of the Pagan community and the larger issues that affect it, and stand ready to respond at need to those. This includes protesting events, situations, or individuals which cause problems for the community.
They use resources wisely and well, with appreciation for the sacrifices required to make them available. They return as much as possible to the care of Mother Earth for transformation. They cultivate renewable resources carefully and prefer these over nonrenewable resources. As much as practical, they strive to avoid profiting from any abuse of resources.
They walk their talk instead of talking their walk; they lead by example and teach by doing. They acknowledge their own flaws and challenges, and work to overcome these.
They possess considerable experience of matters spiritual, magical, social, and practical; yet they continue to seek out new experiences.
They exercise a sense of humor and a sense of wonder, and encourage others to do likewise.
In general, they make the world a better place than it would be without them. When they leave, people are sorry to see them go.

Next, here are some things I consider sufficiently reprehensible that if someone in the a leadership position were to do them, I would lose most or all of my respect for that person:

Child abuse: physical, mental, emotional, sexual, spiritual, whatever. By extension, Elder abuse, which is becoming more of a problem these days. Abuse of others not readily capable of defending themselves.
Completely unprovoked/unjustified violence of significant degree; primarily physical or sexual, but possibly extending into other areas depending on circumstances.
A pattern of vicious and destructive behavior towards animals and/or plants. I don't consider eating meat abusive; I do consider veal farming abusive. I don't consider sustainable forestry wrong; I do consider clearcutting wrong. People who torture or destroy living things without compassion are likely to treat human beings similarly.
Absconding with money entrusted to them by a group, as when a treasurer embezzles money from a company's account.
Crimes against knowledge. These include but are not limited to: Significant and deliberate falsification or obliteration of historical data. Linguistic wrongdoings like raheelhedan (which is a Laadan word meaning, roughly, the act of mistranslating something purposely and with evil intent). Gross plagiarism. Burning books or otherwise attempting to destroy ideas.
Lying about, distorting, sensationalizing, or otherwise misrepresenting Pagan culture and history to nonPagans, especially the media, and especially with evil intent or for personal gain.
Using one's position of authority to extort favors (financial, sexual, magical, political, whatever) from a person looking up to one and/or in one's power. Other abuses of position like using one duty to shirk another, or setting up a false conflict of duty, or behaving in such a way as to cause drastic damage to the position itself.
Denigration and attack of persons belonging to a particular group that one simply happens to despise, without reason of personal injury or distinction among different individuals in said group; especially any action taken to deny members of said group the freedoms, privileges, and rights enjoyed by others.
The fomenting of vicious dissent and misery for no reason, or for bad reasons like idle amusement. Exacerbating a previous problem by mocking or harassing those involved, especially those trying to fix it. Criticizing other people's efforts while expending none of one's own. Gross and gratuitous gossipmongering. I call this "the Bricriu effect." (Bricriu is a figure from Celtic legend, whose name means "bitter tongue" and who caused trouble wherever he went, just for the hell of it.)
Deliberately saying or doing something which one knows will injure or upset another person, specifically for the purpose of discomfiting him, her, or it with evil intent and no good meant. This includes verbal betrayals of trust such as spreading information given into one's keeping as a secret, when there is no good or compelling reason to do so.
Constant, unrelenting disregard for other people's needs, desires, feelings, and general right to a sane existence; without apology, excuse, ameliorating circumstances, or significant attempts to improve one's behavior. A dangerously short temper, especially if one makes no effort to warn people what will set it off ... or even that it exists. A tendency to treat other people as conveniences.
Gross and persistent disrespect of the Divine in whatever form, especially to a degree that might inspire a God(dess) to start lobbing lightning bolts, which could conceivably take out not only the offender but anyone unfortunate enough to be standing nearby. Fooling around with things one knows nothing about, in such as way as might cause serious trouble. An insistence on provoking Fate by saying things like "It couldn't possibly get any worse" in the presence of people who know better and have expressed repeatedly their preference that such things not be said. Mockery of things precious to others.
Major negligence of the sort that causes serious problems, particularly if this happens predictably. Unreliability, especially combined with demands for responsibilities which are then shirked vigorously. Total indifference to the results of same. A general disregard of responsibility when things go wrong, particularly combined with a tendency to grab all the glory should things somehow manage to go right.

Finally, in consideration of other people's ideals, it is worth pointing out that nobody is alone here. We all share the same little blue lifeboat of a planet, and we had better learn to get along. To a certain extent I support the idea of following other people's laws, but I also believe in the obligation to break an unjust law. For example, were slavery to be re-legalized, I would immediately join (even found, if necessary) an underground railroad. If abortion were illegal and a woman came to me for help, I would give her any useful information I had. Sometimes the community at large is just plain wrong. In general, though, I feel that we should be sensitive to the surrounding mores, to a reasonable degree. By developing our own particular set of ethical standards and then comparing that to other options, we can achieve a balance.

Several books stand out as relevant to the matter of ethics and leadership standards. For anyone wishing to read further, I recommend:

Covencraft: Witchcraft for Three or More by Amber K. Llewellyn, 1998.
Inside a Witches' Coven by Edain McCoy. Llewellyn, 1997.
Truth or Dare: Encounters with Power, Authority, and Mystery by Starhawk. Harper & Row, 1987.
When, Why ... If: An Ethics Workbook by Robin Wood. Livingtree Books, 1996.

For more thoughts on Pagan leadership, see also The Pagan Vocation: What Makes a Priest(ess)?.

divider

Comments?

Art on this page is from the "Whiteflower" set, at Winter's Pages

The URL for this page is http://www.worthlink.net/~ysabet/spirit/l-behave.html and it was last updated on October 23, 1998.